Women Work, and Want Men To Work While They Do.

Here it is, a plain fact in the difference between guys and gals.
I can go out at 8 am, and work on the car for 2 hours.
When I get in, I want to relax with a coffee, but by then, the Missus is doing stuff around the house.
During the next hour, if I continue to relax, she will get more and more irritated, and even, in some cases, ask 'When are you going to be getting something done?'

Now, if I am working, I am happy that she is relaxing, and I get on with my own jobs of choice, but with women, that is almost all women, the reverse is true.
They work, we must work too, and it must be on jobs that they want us to work on but will not tell us what they are.

Add PMS and the situation gets critical!

Is Michelle Obama a Hottie?

The answer is simple - YES.
I am tempted to leave it at that, but might as well say why.
Good looking, deep thinking, intelligent.
This is no Bimbo here, this is a woman who can attract guys based on her brains, not that the body is anything to complain about.
My hope is that she will do the things that her hubby cannot do due to him having to be impartial.

Are Bimbo's Worthwhile?

There is something to be said for the straightforward, Grade 4 achieving bimbo. They look hot, they are great as a trophy girlfriend, all your guy friends will think that you are a hero, etc etc.

But not all Bimbo's are what they appear to be. There are a whole bunch who are the 'I will look like a Bimbo to get my own way' types.
They are the ones who have discovered the power in NOT having sex.
Here is how to identify the Non-Bimbo Bimbo.
The look will be hot, they will typically dress to the same styles as those who are many years younger.
The body will be well looked after - no helpings of 6 burgers for these babies! They have the power that the hot looking body gives them, and they intend to keep it.
They will refer to their past a lot, yet give no firm information. This is to give an air of mystery, as well as make them an unknown quantity.
When pushed for sex, even after many dates, they will instead make vague references to other guys that they do have, or have had sex with. This is to give the impression that they are sexually inclined, but the truth is they are basically frigid.
They will typically have a habit or other expenses that they need funding for. Drink, drugs, maybe. Or maybe they need a dude to work on their car, or their house.

So, if you get involved with a Non-Bimbo, you should now be able to see the signs after a few dates. At that time they will probably be reassuring you that they are really attracted to you, but right now 'only as a friend' but they will 'see how it goes, it might develop'.

The way to check this out is to fail to chase them for a while, and make them do the work. They will quickly fade away, only to keep popping up in your life once in a while, when they are at a loose end, or need some help with something.

But, the true Bimbo is different. What a delight. So simple in the mind. No political discussions, no general knowledge discussions. They live to have a good time, and then go to bed with the guy who gave them the good time. And the more sophisticated he is, the more awestruck they are.
Like going to a strip club, or going to bed with a woman with a large chest, every man should have a Bimbo in his life at some point, however short-lived it may be.

What A Guy Shouldn't Say In Bed

Here is a list of some stuff I was thinking of that would totally tick off most women:

Oh MY God! Those boobs sure are droopy/small/weird/ugly!
Are those ripples on your thighs caused by cellulite?
Those (enter clothing name) always look like crap.
I am too tired to bother with making any effort tonight, but still want stuff, is that OK?
It is funny how all that flab compresses and spills over the top of your belt.
I think I just peed in bed.
You must have peed, the bed is wet.
Of course I farted, I'm a guy.
Of course I belched loudly and with pride, I'm a guy.
I have to fart, I hope that is OK.
My other wife/girlfriend had better (enter body part) than you have.
You have PMS, that is why you are in a bad mood.
Why do 'you chicks' always (enter annoying thing chicks sometimes do).

There could be more, but it might get too bad, even for me!

Actual Case Of Wife's Useless Directions (Don't tell her I did this, she might cut me in the middle of the night)

So, the Missus phones at around 9am, saying she had locked the car keys in the car! So, I had to go 60 miles away to open it for her. Then another 60 miles back.
Here are both the directions she gave me, and then below them the actual route I took.

she I am at Ravenswood rd
me Where is that?
she Near Clayton Park.
me Is that Clayton Park Rd?
she Yes.
me So you are at the junction of Ravenswood and Clayton Park Rd, is that correct?
she Yes, you go across Lacewood.
me Where is that?
she You know Joseph Howe Drive?
me No , I know the name, but don't know which road it is to look at. OK, so, I go down the highway 102, and.......
she You come down highway 102 and you know the park by the bridge? (Note - this is in the centre of the City)
me Yes, but I don't know how to get to it.
she Ok, well, you should be able to find it ok. Go out of the park, and ...........
me Do I turn left, or right out of the park?
she You turn right, and go through that bad junction, and take the lane marked for Bedford.
she Then you carry on the Bedford Highway and get to a road called Bayview. Turn left at Bayview. Keep straight on and don't turn off at Lacewood.
me Ok, I will be about 75 minutes. I will stop to look up a map online first.
she Ok, bye luv u.
me Bye, luv u.

Now here is the actual route I took.
Went down 102 highway, and took the Bedford Exit.
Went through Bedford and took Bedford Highway towards Halifax.
Turned right at Bayview.
Kept straight across Lacewood.
Road changed to Clayton Park Rd. at other side of Lacewood.
Went on until came to Ravenswood. No car, no Wife. Went into Ravenswood, and cruised around until it came to dead end, where the car was parked up in a driveway. Not at the junction.

I asked why she didn't just direct me to take the Bedford highway from the other end of it, and her reply was that it is "the long way around."
So, instead I get directed to an obscure park beside a bridge that I know when I get there, but have no idea how specifically to get to it. And from there past an irritating congested dog-eats-dog junction to get to the same place that I just actually cruised right to directly from the highway.

Living proof that women are irritating when giving directions. Not only do they have no concept that the listener does not know the roads etc, but they will actually get annoyed when told that the listener does not know the road mentioned.

Fortunately, women are pretty good to have around to cook meals and keep the bed warm.
And that's what this man thinks!

Why Do Women Give Bad Directions?

I just got back from a trip where I was intending to assist the missus by going to several of her worksites and do some work on her behalf. You know, give her a break.
Well, I never actually managed to get to all the places I wanted - I was able to get to the ones that had to be done, but I thought I would take the time to cruise around and take a look at the others places, so I could find them maybe during the week, and give her a hand.
So, I didn't find the places. I reviewed the directions when I returned, and I don't believe that I could get to all of them even now. The reason for this is the directions that women give in abot 99% of all cases, so to illustrate this, I will give an example of an actual journey description that I would give if asked, although I have changed the landmarks and road names. I will then follow this with a description that a typical woman might give for the same journey.

My Description:
Go out of this driveway, and turn left.
Go to the bottom of the road as far as you can go, where there is a stop sign at a 'T' junction.
Turn Right, and go about half a mile including passing a pizza place, until you reach a main crossroads where there is a stop sign with red flashing light and a gas station and pharmacy. Be careful, it is not a 4 way stop, the road going across has priority.
Turn Left, and go along for quite a few miles, I reckon maybe ten minutes, during this time you will pass Dorkville village sign, then Moronville, then as you carry on you will pass the signs for CretinTown. Once yo have reached the sign for CretinTown, slow down, because you have to turn off there.
Soon after entering CretinTown, you will see a Fire Station and Community Hall on the Right, with he name 'CretinTown Community Hall' on it.
Just past the Fire Station there is a small road on the right, I don't remember the name, but it is maybe 2 or 3 houses only past the Fire Hall.
Go down there and you will see a Yellow house on the left, maybe 3 houses down, and that is the one you want. The guy has a powerboat outside on a trailer, and the house has a garage at the Left side of it, but built in as part of the house. The guy runs a White Ford Pickup truck with an oil drum always sticking up from the bed.

Now the womans description:
Go down to the end of the road and turn right.
Go down to I think it is the next crossroads, and turn left.
Go a few miles until you are in CretinTown, and the road is just there on the right, with the house you want just a little bit up that road, it is really easy, you can't miss it, he might have a truck outside.

And that is why it is best to get directions from a guy!

Problems With Female Breasts That Guys Don't Think About.

Now, isn't this a great subject, hehehe.
I was walking in the back garden just now, thinking of maybe mowing grass, but deciding that there were too many bugs, when it occurred to me that for guys things are easy. We wear a shirt or a t-shirt, and just swat the bugs away as they buzz around.
For the chicks, it might not be that easy.
Gravity can work against cleavage to create issues. For instance, I am on the beach, and throw a handful of sand at the Missus. She has a low-cut top, say, and down the sand goes. It then sticks to the inside parts of the boobies, and causes friction as they move in relation to each other.
How about wasps and hornets? Get one of those trapped in there, and they will sting until someone reaches down in there, and separates the breasts to allow the insect out.
The good thing is, of course, that I would be able to happily conduct a rescue to any larger breasted chick any time that they want, insects or none. Smaller titties don't have the problem, of course. The separation that is inherent in the smaller tittie design allows easy escape for not only insects, but also humming birds, mice, small bunny rabbits, as well as giving good drainage for liquids such as beer, suntan oil, and of course, bird pooh.
On the other hand, the larger varieties allow for the crushing of bugs by simply pressing on the outside edges of both boobies. Or the asphyxiation of smaller mammals by means of the same technique.
Then we have the hot weather issues. It is generally bad to have outside epidermis (skin) pressed against itself. The moisture cannot evaporate. This can no doubt (I have a good imagination) cause fungus based problems similar to athletes foot. There are two answers to this - plenty of regular showers coupled with applications of powder, or get a bra that pulls the boobies apart and holds them under the arms.
The more I think about this, the happier I am in preferring small boobs.